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Taking a break.

Nov. 1st, 2005 | 10:16 am

I'm taking a break from writing for a bit.

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Let's get straight to fucking.

Oct. 9th, 2005 | 12:11 pm

I fucked two guys yesterday, one I don't want to write about and one I do. I don't want to write about the first guy cuz I actually like him, it's not just a fuck, so it seems wrong to write about it (plus I don't want to jinx anything). But the other guy I've written about many times before so, whatever. I've been avoiding him lately, he gets so irritating when he comes over, but damn he's a good fuck. He was text messaging me all day -- "How about a rainy day fuck session?" "What are you up to boy, I miss fucking you," etcetera. He finally talked me in to having him come over after midnight, but I told him, "Let's get straight to fucking, I'll be waiting."

He came in and stripped, I was just wearing pajama pants when he came in so I dropped those and he laid down on the bed and I sucked on his cock a little bit, just enough to get him hard, and he grabbed the back of my head to hold me still and fucked my mouth for a little bit. Then he literally picked me up and put me on my back and plunged into my cunt, deep and hard. We both let out moans at the same time as he sunk in, and then started fucking hard right away. He gripped me arms, just below my shoulders. and held me down while he fucked me. I held my legs up and wrapped them around his body and eventually we got into this tight embrace, my hands gripping at his shoulders and his gripping at mine while he pounded into me.

He pulled out and moved me onto my side and pushed my knees up to my chest. He spread my ass cheeks, drove his cock into my cunt and fingered my asshole at the same time. He asked to fuck my ass but I said no, I wasn't in the mood. So he kept pounding my cunt, holding my body down, and I closed my eyes tight and focused on how good it felt. He kept going faster and harder until he slammed into me, slamming my whole body against the wall, shooting into me. Hmm. He said he was around today, maybe I should call him...

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Coagulated Glob of Cum

Sep. 30th, 2005 | 05:02 pm

I looked at transfag's recent entries this morning and realized it was pushing two weeks since I'd written anything, so I logged onto Manhunt to see if I could make something happen, and right away this guy instant messaged me on the site, and he was just very aggressive about wanting to meet as soon as possible and that he thought I was so cute and so attractive and please can we meet. Now honestly...I get guys that are very insistent like that fairly often, but usually when a guy is insistent like that it's because they're a little too into the trans thing. Or they're just really pathetic guys that I have like, less-than-zero attraction.

But this guy didn't read my profile, he didn't know I was trans, so it wasn't that he was smarmy like that. And he was super cute and my age. And so I agreed to meet him and just by luck did it come out that he didn't know I was trans, because I told him a couple times to read my profile so I just assumed he was one of those cool guys that didn't give a shit. So when it came out, I said, "It's cool if you're not interested, no hard feelings." He was silent for a little bit, and then he replied, "No, it's cool, I don't judge, bud."

I snuck out of work and fifteen minutes later he was walking in the front door of my apartment. I told him I just wanted to suck him, we really didn't have time to do much more (I had to be back at work), so he unzipped his pants and we got right to business. His cock was a little small, but it's kinda nice giving a small cock a blow job, cuz it's like you can totally own that cock -- physically, given the limitations of how wide I can open my mouth and how deep I can get somethinhg down my throat, it's just easier to really do what you want with smaller guys.

His cock was soft and I licked the head a little bit and then just closed my whole mouth around it and he let out this low, guttural groan. And his cock started getting hard right away, and it swelled and filled my mouth and pushed down my throat, and once he was really hard, I started gliding my lips and mouth up and down his shaft.

After a couple minutes I went for his balls and he started jerking his cock with his hand. I got my mouth back on his cock and he grabbed my hair and pushed my face down onto his cock. When I was licking his balls, he would jerk off with his dick up against my face, basically masturbating on my cheek, and then push his dick back in my mouth.

He shot while he was jerking off and rubbing his dick on my face, which was really hot, but he shot into my hair. I had to be back at work, I didn't have time to take a shower! So I tried to clean up in the sink, thought I got it all, and then as I was walking back to work I found a coagulated glob of cum on my forehead.

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Relief Work

Sep. 21st, 2005 | 11:02 pm

I went over to this guy's place after work. He was about 30 but looked younger, black, a little taller than me, cute in the face. He showed me in and we went downstairs and I put down my bag and kicked off my shoes, and then his hands were around me and he was kissing me and biting my lip. We started stripping and kissing and pulling each other's nipples.

We took turns pulling each other's shirts off, then each other's pants, then each other's underwear, and I held his dick while he kissed my neck. I pulled back from him and got down on my knees and started sucking the head of his dick. His dick was really long and I could only get it maybe 2/3 down, but then he just grabbed the back of my head and forced his dick down my throat and somehow it all went in. He let me up and back to regular sucking for a little bit, then forced my head down again. Three or four times in total.

I stood up and we went over to the couch, he had me lay down on my back and he laid on top of me and rubbed the head of his dick on mine. He fingered my asshole and started pushing into my cunt, just the head, and then he shoved the entire length of his dick in and it hurt. It was going really deep, almost too deep, and he pulled my legs up so my feet were by his head and fucked deep and hard. He just kept pounding while I gritted my teeth and moaned. Just about when I was ready to say it was too much, he started crying out and jerking his hips into me, deeper and deeper, he cried out, and collapsed down on me, kissing me as he moaned and rocked his hips.

Afterwards I found out he was displaced by hurricane Katrina, so I figure I can count this as relief work.

He also asked if I got my surgery here, and I said, "My what? I haven't had surgery."

"Oh...I thought that was surgically created."

"No...I was born this way...female. I was born female. I'm going female to male."

Tags: ,

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Verbal Top

Sep. 18th, 2005 | 02:27 pm

This guy came over for another go, he came in and undid his pants and pulled out his cock and ordered me onto my knees.

He told me what he wanted, to shoot a big load onto my face and leave me covered in cum. So I asked him if he liked to take pictures, cuz everyone should have a pic of their face covered in cum. But he really got into taking pics, making me pose with my mouth open and the head of his cock resting on my tongue, he made me pull my breasts out of the way so the pics would make it look like a had a flat chest, he took one from the side with his cock completely down my throat...a nice portfolio, really.

He's a very verbal top, and the whole time I was sucking his cock he was calling me a faggot whore, telling me exactly what and how to suck Fucking tongue my piss hole, faggot. He made me suck his balls, and when I pulled one of his balls into my mouth he pushed me off and said, "You trying to hurt me, whore?" And then he slapped me, grabbed the back of my head and shoved my face down on his nut sack and said, "Now tongue it, you think you can handle that?"

He made me get back on his dick, held my head all the way down so his dick was lodged in my throat, and closed my nose with his fingers. He made me look up at him while his dick choked me. And then he took a picture before letting me get a breath.

He snapped clothespins onto my nipples and made me eat his ass, then shoved his cock into my throat to muffle my cries while he put another two clothespins on.

"Does it hurt, faggot?"

I mumbled yes on his cock, and he pulled my head off his dick and said, "Yes, Sir," and I repeated my answer, "Yes, Sir."

He pushed me back down on his cock and told me how the next time he comes over, I'm going to be blindfolded and he's bringing a friend to "fill both holes."

He pulled his dick out and told me to open my mouth and streams of hot cum hit my face, my chest, and landed in my mouth. He held his dick at my mouth and took a picture of my face dripping in cum. He went into the bathroom and washed up, we both got dressed, and he left with a "take it easy man, thanks!"
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Sep. 13th, 2005 | 01:07 pm

He sent me a photo of himself, naked, wearing a leather harness and cock ring. He was quite a bit older (maybe in his 70s), but in shape and handsome. I walked over to his place late at night, after midnight, not really excited about the fuck but excited about the money. It was strange, it really felt like I was going to "work."

I was several minutes early so I wandered around on his block smoking a cigarette, contemplating just going home and standing him up, but I eventually rang the doorbell. There was no answer for a couple minutes, I rang again, and actually got my hopes up that I was getting stood up instead, but then he answered and showed me in. He was quite a bit shorter and smaller than me, really warm and friendly, and we walked up to the third floor where his bedroom was. It took him a long time to "set up," he fiddled with the stereo for awhile, he fiddle with the lights, he left the room and came back several times...then he handed me $100 and said, "You ready?"

We got on the bed and kissed a little bit, started removing clothes, his dick was small and soft and the whole time I was there he never really got hard. We were on his bed "fooling around" for over an hour, and he seemed to be enjoying himself, but I couldn't get him off. Right around then, after I'd been there almost two hours, I pulled my mouth off his cock and said, "I think I better head home," half-wondering if he was going to ask for his money back. But he was very pleasant, acted like he had a good time and that's all he was expecting anyways, we got dressed and he showed me out.

This was about a week ago. Since then, I put another ad up and got a lot of responses (probably cuz I posted a half-naked body shot with my head cut off along with the ad), but I haven't been able to bring myself to actually meet any of them. I feel kind of icky and just don't want to right now. It's been a couple weeks now since I've had sex for sex's sake, just for the fun of it, and I miss that. I don't want it to feel like work. I'm sure I'll do it again, if I'm in a spot and need some money, but I don't know if this is how I want to raise money for surgery.

One of the things I really like about my sex life right now is that it feels very empowering - being with men who treat me like a man has done amazing things for me, most notably it's given me the self esteem that I've never had. Making sure that it continues to make me feel like that is more important than the money right now.

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More paying tricks.

Sep. 5th, 2005 | 03:06 pm

I have this half-brained idea to give sex work a shot to pay for top surgery. This is my plan, and this is why I've been writing about accepting money for sex lately. And so far it's been going okay, in some ways it makes me look at my partners differently. That is, I expect a lot more from the people I'm voluntarily fucking.

But I had a guy come over on Saturday, $200 to fuck me (and I learned my lesson and got the money up front). And it was great, he sat on my couch and I sucked him for a long time. Then he reversed and wanted to suck me off, so I let him. He finished off by fucking my cunt, sat there for a second and recovered, then got dressed and left. I love that.

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Lame. Weak.

Sep. 2nd, 2005 | 01:29 pm

I put up another ad on craigslist looking for money for sex cuz making that $100 was the easiest money I've ever made in my life. I got quite a few responses, some might pan out, most probably won't. But one guy was emailing me all day and he wanted to meet, but he was really nervous and wanted to get a drink first. Now pardon my insensitivity, but I don't want to "get to know" my tricks, I don't want to go out with them, all I want is to do whatever they're paying for and get them out. But he was all nervous and so I felt bad and decided to meet him for a drink.

He meets me at this bar by my house at 6:45 but tells me he has to leave by 7:15 to catch his train home, so I'm thinking, "Great, I'm getting played." But I stayed and watched him down three or four Scotches while I smoked a couple cigarettes. We talked, he was Indian (from India) and his conversation was riddled with comments regarding how he felt a lot of culture shock, how he didn't have any friends, how he was very lonely, how he wished he had companionship. And then it turned to me, how sweet and nice I was, how he really felt close to me, how I was so understanding and "blessed," and how much he was enjoying my company. And then he slipped in that he wanted to go back to my place, he ordered a six pack of beer to go and went to the ATM and then we left.

We get back to my place, drink a beer, we're sitting on the couch and he's obviously very nervous. We continue our conversation, and then out of nowhere he says, "May I please see your bottom?" To myself I think, finally this is going somewhere and I strip and get down on my knees, but he stops me. He played with my nipples, kept saying "wow" over and over, ran his hands all over me, but when I went for his dick or to remove any of his clothing he stopped me and asked to slow down.

So by this point I'm getting really frustrated, I just want to get this guy out of my apartment. I feel bad cuz he's so obviously attention-starved, but this isn't going well. He tells me he gives really good massages and do I want one and I say sure, why not, and he rubbed lotion all over me and it did feel good, but I was completely naked and letting him touch me everywhere, and he was fully clothed and didn't seem like that was going to change anytime soon.

After the massage, he said something to the effect of, "I really want to do this but I can't afford it." I was with this guy for almost two hours by that point, both of us very openly working under the premise that he was going to pay me for sex (he even went to the ATM before we left the bar) and now, after I've been fully naked and let him kiss me and touch me everywhere, he's telling me he can't afford it. So we make small talk for a few minutes, then he puts his shoes on and says he should go and I don't say anything, I don't want to be rude (I'm too nice sometimes), but I didn't want to give him any reason to think I wanted him to stay, either. He stood up and I stooked up and I walked him to the door, and then he grabbed me and kissed me really deeply, said, "I love you," and just stood there until I literally had to push him out the door.

After he left I took the longest hot shower I've ever taken, scrubbing everything from my tongue to in-between my toes. And then I smoked some pot and just started laughing about how ridiculous that was. I feel bad for the guy, I really do, and that's why I'm not mad, he obviously is desperate for companionship, but it was still pretty weak.

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Fold of Crisp Twenties

Aug. 29th, 2005 | 03:33 pm

He offered $100 to meet me for a quickie at lunch, so I took off from my job and met him at my place at 12:30. He came in, I told him to make himself comfortable, and he walked more into the center of the room. I came up to him, rubbed my hands on his chest and his dick through his jeans. I dropped to my knees, he said, "yeah..." and I unbuckled and unbuttoned his pants. He wasn't wearing underwear, his cock flopped right out semi-hard, and I started to suck the head, slowing taking more and more of the shaft in my mouth. His dick was really big, I couldn't get it all in my mouth, I was at least an inch and a half shy of the base.

I sucked his balls, first one then the other into my mouth. I pulled my shirt and binder off for him and he played with my nipples and I went back to sucking his cock. He told me to stand up, I did, and he pulled my pants down and fingered my cunt. "Bend over and suck my dick while I do this," he said, and so I bent over to get my mouth on his dick while he finger fucked me.

After another minute or so he said, "You want this load down your throat?" I nodded yes (my mouth was full of cock) and he filled my mouth. I gently sucked as his dick started to go soft, and then let his cock slip out of my mouth, licking the head a little. We both got dressed right away, he handed me a fold of crisp twenties and took off. Getting to suck cock and making money for it rules.

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Rough Riders

Aug. 25th, 2005 | 10:07 am

This guy (a.k.a. best fuck ever) came over last night, we made out in the doorway of my apartment and I pulled him inside. He fumbled with my pants, pulled them down, and gently pushed me down on the futon, and proceeded to give me the most amazing blow job ever. I felt weird having him so focused on my dick (which I guess is stupid considering how focused I get on some guy's dicks) and kept trying to pull him up or give him an out but he kept going and it was just incredible, no wonder guys like blow jobs so much.

He kept me sitting on the couch and I pulled my legs up and he started fucking my cunt straight away, fast and hard, until we started to slip out of position and he had me get down on my hands and knees, my face pressed into the floor while he fucked me really hard from behind, pushing me across the floor until I collapsed almost flat and he collapsed onto me and kept going.

He pulled me up and we went back on the futon, on my hands and knees, pounding into my cunt from behind, then he spit on my asshole and started fingering my ass while he fucked my cunt. And then his cock was pushing in my ass, hard and big, and all of a sudden he sunk all the way in and we both groaned loud.

He was fucking me hard, and I was gripping the couch tight to hold on. When he pulled out the condom got stuck in my ass and I had to go run to the bathroom to pull it out, and when I came back he was sitting down jerking off, so I got down between his knees to help him out. I sucked him and worked his balls with my free hand, and after a little bit I was sucking just the head while he jerked off furiously into my mouth, his PA clattering around against my teeth, my lips going numb from sucking, and he filled my mouth with cum as he groaned and exhaled loudly. After he stopped shooting, I swallowed, and licked the head of his cock and he jumped.

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Aug. 22nd, 2005 | 05:09 pm

After the last guy left I got a text message from one of my regular guys asking if I had any time today. I thought about it for a second, cuz this guy's really irritating but a really good fuck, and decided to have him come over but to set up "things to do" right afterward so I wouldn't have to talk to him for too long.

He came in about forty-five minutes later, we made idle "how you been" chit chat while we both stripped, pulled out the futon, and laid down. I started sucking him, and he grabbed my head and held me down until I gagged and threw up just a little of saliva. He held me head in place and fucked my face, then literally picked me up and pulled me up to him and bit my nipples. He wrapped his arms around me and squeezed my whole body hard and then released and pushed my mouth back down on his cock.

He told me to lie down, and he pushed my knees up to my shoulders and shoved into my cunt. His cock is big and it fuckin' hurt, but he just started pounding away and it very quickly stopped hurting. He jerked off my dick while he fucked me, and this guy just fucks so hard. He shot in my cunt and we both collapsed just tingly and out of breath. I always have cramps after this guy fucks my cunt, damn.

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w/s intro

Aug. 22nd, 2005 | 03:00 pm

Before, 10:54am:

He just called and he's on his way, about 30 to 35 minutes. We found each other online sometime in the middle of last week and hit it off right away, mostly cuz we both have the same dirty interests checked on our profiles. We've been chatting for awhile and decided to set up a scene today during the day at my place since I have off from work. So he's on his way, I'm to be lying naked on my bed on my stomach with my hands restrained behind my back, the door unlocked, and to have drunk a lot of water. He's going to come in, restrain me further, put a gag and blindfold on, and then go to work. We'll see what happens. :)

After, 1:00pm:

I buzzed him in, unlocked the door, and went up to my bed, naked, and laid on my stomach, waiting with my wrists restrained. I kept my head buried in the pillow so I couldn't see him, but I heard him come in. I heard him come close to the bed so I assume he was looking at me, and then I heard him undress. I moved a little bit and he said, "What are you doing, boy? I don't think I told you to move." He climbed up the ladder to my bed (loft bed) and ran his hands up my legs, spread my ass cheeks, moved his fingers across my asshole. He felt up to my cunt and pushed a couple fingers against my dick and started jerking me off. I moaned and he said, "You like that, boy?" I didn't say anything and he slapped my ass hard and repeated, "I said, 'You like that, boy?'" I moaned "yes" into the pillow and he slapped me again.

"Yes what?"

"Yes sir."

"Good boy. Put your ass up."

I pushed up onto my knees and he started finger fucking my cunt. Then I could feel his body come into contact with mine as he leaned up to my head and pulled a blindfold over my eyes. I hadn't looked at him yet, I had no idea what he looked like, and now I really wouldn't be able to see him. He asked if that was okay and I said, "Yes sir."

He pushed his hands under my torso and grabbed my nipples and started twisting them while he ground his cock against the crack of my ass. I pushed up on my hands so my chest wasn't pushed up against the mattress and simultaneously pushed my ass back into his cock and he slid it up and down my crack while he pulled on my nipples.

He let go of my nipples and I felt something coming around my head and then felt a ball gag being pushed into my mouth, the strap tightening behind my head. "How's that?" he asked, and I tried to answer with my mouth stuffed full of rubber, and he laughed and said, "Oh that's right, you can't talk. This is a nice paddle you got here boy, ready to feel it on your ass?" And he smacked my ass hard with the paddle, I grunted into the gag, and felt as he rubbed the side of the paddle up and down my crack and against my dick. Then he slapped me again, and again, going between my right and left ass cheek, each time a little bit harder until I was crying out into the gag. He stopped and said, "You had enough, boy? You want me to stop?" I nodded my head yes and he said, "Really? You can take another for me though, don't you think?" I nodded my head again and he struck my ass. "And how about another, boy?" And he hit me again. And then ten more times, and I bit down hard into the gag as my ass burned.

Then he had me move downstairs off the bed and had me stand naked in front of him as he put a collar around my neck and ankle restraints on me. He took chains and restrained my hands above my head and spread and restrained my legs wide. He put clamps on the very tips of my nipples and it felt like fire against my skin, he ran a chain between the clamps, and ran it tight up to my collar.

"Now you're going to feel my paddle, are you ready?"

I nodded and felt him rub it against my ass, it was covered in something, probably leather. It stung, not as much as the other paddle he used though. He struck me another twenty times or so and then I felt his cock pushing into my ass. He pushed the head in, holding my hole open, and gently pushed and pulled out, not even really moving more than the skin. I groaned and he pulled out. I felt him releasing the chains that held my wrists and he pushed me forward, placing a chair in front of me, so I was bent completely over and my legs restrained wide open.

"That's nice, boy." And he struck my ass with the wooden paddle again, hard. I cried out and he did it again. Then his cock moved into my ass and he started fucking hard right away. I gripped the chair hard as he pounded into me. He'd pull out, slap my ass, and then shove right in. I started groaning, it felt so good. He reached around and undid the gag from my mouth and said, "You want my piss in you, boy?" I said yes, and he pulled out of my ass and undid my ankles. He led me over to the futon and said, "I'm gonna sit here, boy, and you're going to worship my cock with your mouth. And if you do a good job, maybe I'll piss in you."

I kneeled between his legs and sucked his cock for a long time. I pulled off and spit on it, licked the spit off the head, and then slid the whole cock back into my mouth. He was leaking pre-cum in my mouth and he pushed me off his cock. "Let's go in the bathroom boy, I gotta piss."

He had me kneel in the shower, put his dick in my mouth, and said, "Drink up." My mouth filled with his piss and I tried to swallow fast, it really wasn't that bad, but then I logically thought about what I was doing and gagged (dammit). I sputtered and said, "I'm sorry sir, I don't think I can do that yet." He said, "That's ok," and released a stream of piss all over my face and it ran down my body. "Get up and bend over." I did, and he pushed the head of his cock in my ass, and released little jets of piss into my ass. I could feel it pulsing and the warmth filling up my ass, and it felt awesome. When he was done, he pulled out and stepped back and said, "Clean up and meet me back out there."

I quickly rinsed off and went back out. He had me straddle him and fuck my cunt on his cock, and he asked where I wanted his load, and I told him either on me or down my throat. He chose to shoot down my throat, so I started sucking him off, he grabbed the shaft of his dick and pushed the head into my mouth and jacked off into my mouth. It was a really big load, several spurts down my throat.

And then we cleaned up, talked a little bit, and decided we need to do that again. He said he has access to a sling. :)

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Aug. 18th, 2005 | 01:14 pm

I notice that when I don't hook up for an extended period of time (being like two weeks for me), I get really nervous about hooking up...even with all the good experiences I've had, I still get really nervous. This guy was supposed to come over last night (and cancelled and then was supposed to show up this morning but didn't) and I was really really nervous both times which surprised me cuz I've been with this guy before. I guess that adds to the experience, I just wish it wasn't the kind of nervousness that makes me want to cancel on people.

But my search for aggressive tops goes on...this guy that was supposed to meet me yesterday wanted me naked on my knees waiting for him when he came in, he was going to use my mouth, shoot on my face, and leave. Dammit, I wish he'd come by this morning, that would have been a great way to start my day. Then there's this guy that wanted to come over tonight to just spank me (no sex, which is fine with me) but I worry about doing that in my tiny apartment (although I'm sure my neighbors have heard just about everything coming from my place by this point). And then there's this guy that wants to paddle and ass rape me and I'm really into it except he can't spell and his grammar is just generally horrible and that's such a turn off. I'm talking to him right now and he told me I would be required to "message" him when I see him. And I'm thinking, "Why would I message you if I'm with you in person?" only to realize later that he actually means "massage." But he keeps saying "message" and "messaging" and I can't take people seriously who cannot communicate well.

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Oh thank you.

Aug. 7th, 2005 | 03:12 pm
music: Outkast - Bombs Over Baghdad

I put an ad up on craigslist that basically said, "Make me your bitch." I got one guy who wanted to rough me up a little and fuck my ass today and I told him I only had a couple hours, but if we could get together and do it in that time to come on over. So I showered and washed out my ass while waiting for him to come over, he rang the bell and I buzzed him up. He was a big white guy, a little taller than me, average Joe kinda guy. 30 or so, short brown hair, little bigger than average cock, a little chubby but I don't mind a little chub (makes me less self-conscious about my chub).

I let him in and straight away he started manhandling me, grabbing my ass, my shoulders, turning me around, grabbing my crotch and squeezing. He pulled my shorts down and asked me for a condom, then he told me to bend over and he started working his cock into my ass dry. He slapped my ass and then put some lube on his cock and into my hole and pushed in hard all the way. It stretched my asshole hard and it hurt, and he pulled back out completely and then pushed back in all the way and it hurt again.

He bent me over part of my bed and kicked my legs wide apart and started fucking my ass in earnest, pushing in, doing about ten strokes, then pulling all the way out and shoving it back in again for another few strokes. It hurt, I was grimacing and gripping the wood I was up against tightly while he fucked my ass. I wanted to ask him to stop, but I wanted the accomplishment of taking it all more.

He moved me over to the couch and had me bend over, my face pressed up against the wall, he used a little more lube and shoved back into my asshole and I yelped. He pulled his cock out and just worked the head in and out so my asshole kept contracting and stretching over his head, and I started to whimper and he said, "You're so tight boy, the feels so good on my big cock."

After a bit of that he told me to get on my back and bend my legs up and he started fucking my asshole that way. He pulled out, switched condoms, and started fucking my cunt from the same position, just slamming his whole body into me.

We were going at it for awhile when he said, "Sorry, sorry, I don't know why, I just can't cum." I offered to try and suck a load out of him and he said, "Okay, it'll be fun either way." His cock tasted like condom though and it made me gag a little (how people give bj's with condoms on is beyond me), but it went away eventually and I threw in a class A suck job on his dick (he deserved at least that after the fucking he just gave me) but he still couldn't cum. We tried fucking again, he jerked off into my face, and he just couldn't. But whatever, I'm sure he was disappointed but I had a great time, that was just what I needed.

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Pac Man

Aug. 7th, 2005 | 10:40 am

Apparently I'm having issues with bad kissers these days. I went over to this guy's place last night (very ritzy condo, I had to be announced by the doorman as a visitor before I could go upstairs) for what I was hoping was going to be some good fucking. The guy was in his mid-40s, taller than me which is always nice, mustache and round little geeky glasses. He took me out on his balcony and showed me the whole view of the city which was beautiful.

We went back inside and I grabbed his cock through his shorts and he started to kiss me, but he was just a terrible kisser. He opened his mouth before he kissed, so it looked like Pac Man coming at your face. I tried to avoid kissing him by blowing him but he kept pulling me up for more fish face.

He had me get up on him and straddle him and we rubbed our dick heads against each other and I asked him if wanted to fuck and he didn't answer. He kepf rubbing his dick on my cunt, jerking himself off, and then he tried to push inside me and I literally reached down and pulled him out and said, "Not without a condom, I have some in my pocket." And he muttered something like, "Oh no, I just wanted to know what it felt like," and jerked himself off and he shot like thirty seconds later.

I got dressed and had to listen to him talk about how difficult it was for him to live in New York, because apparently, if you're just "regular people" like him and me, you can't afford to live in New York. (He's saying this and I'm thinking, "You've got a fucking Rembrandt on your wall, you're not regular people, my apartment is furnished in plywood.") So that was disappointing. It should not be this hard to find someone to fuck the shit out of you on a Saturday night.
EDIT 8/9/05: If you took this entry to mean I live in New York, you're wrong.
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Tic Tac?

Aug. 5th, 2005 | 05:46 pm
mood: hothot

Ugh, this guy sucked. Just everything about him sucked. He talked too much and he was an idiot. He wasn't attractive at all (looked nothing like his pictures). He had terrible breath and insisted on kissing (slobbering, actually) me constantly. It took him forever to finish, and it was just...bleh.

I've been so busy this week that I haven't had much time for hook ups, and then this one was such a let down...this weekend needs to include some good, hard fucking.

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15 Minutes Before Work

Aug. 1st, 2005 | 08:50 am

He told me to be on my knees, in underwear and a tank top, ready to suck his dick when he walked through the door. Except after I buzzed him in I forgot to unlock my apartment door so I had to get up and let him in and as I opened the door he said, "Aren't you supposed to be on your knees, faggot?" I mumbled something about having to get up to get the door open and he said, "Shut up and suck on that cock."

His cock was hard and pushing through his shorts already, I pulled it out and started sucking his dick, and he pushed my head down on it and just berated me the whole time, calling me a faggot, telling me I was a shitty cocksucker, and forcing my head down until I choked on his dick. He pushed me off, turned around and bent over and said, "Eat that ass, fag." I licked and fingered his asshole for a minute or two and then he stood up, shoved his dick back in my mouth and said, "You got a dildo, fag? Put it in your cunt and fuck yourself."

He pulled my shirt and binder off my torso and I kicked off my underwear and started fucking myself while I sucked on his dick. He pushed me back off his dick and said, "You call that fucking yourself? Do it harder faggot, show me how hard you can take it." So I fucked myself harder until he pulled me back onto his dick.

He sat down on the couch and I followed him on my knees and sucked his dick while I kept fucking myself and he said, "What do you want me to do, faggot? You want me to fuck you?" I mumbled a yes and nodded my head as much as I could without breaking my sucking rhythm too much. He said, "Where do you want it?"

I pulled off his dick for a sec and said, "Fuck my cunt." He said, "Faggots don't have cunts boy," and I said, "Well this one does."

He pushed me onto the floor and said, "Get your ass up boy, you're getting fucked."

I got on all fours and he positioned behind me and pushed up into my cunt in one thrust. He gave me a pretty decent fucking, fingered my ass a little bit, and slapped my ass a few times with the occasional, "Take it, faggot."

He came pretty quick, cleaned up, we shook hands, and he was out the door exactly fifteen minutes after he walked in.

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I wanna take you to a gay bar.

Jul. 30th, 2005 | 05:29 pm

I don't even know where to start with this one.

There's one guy, M, who I've been talking to since practically the first day I put up my profile. We hadn't met, but we've talked online several times and have made tentative plans several times but have never actually followed through. Two months I've been talking to this guy before I finally agree to meet him at [insert generic homo club name] last night around midnight.

At the same time as I'm making plans with M, I was browsing craigslist (honestly hoping to find someone in my neighborhood that I could just blow really quick, I was supposed to meet a guy right after work and he cancelled last minute and I was all in the mood to blow him so I was looking for a replacement). Someone posted that they were looking for a "younger bitch boy" in my neighborhood and I fit all of his criteria to the letter except for, well, you know. So I messaged him from my anonymous email address and introduced myself, gave him a general description, told him I'd been looking for a situation like that for awhile and I think I might be what he's looking for, except that there was one catch (isn't there always?) and I told him I was a transguy, "i was born female but live as male (and look and act completely male, too). i understand if you're not interested, just had to give it a shot." He wrote back and said, "Sounds fun. I like the honesty." He said he was hitting the bars that night and maybe we could meet up and I told him I was already planning on being at [insert generic homo club name] and we decided to meet up there. I told him what I was wearing and he said he'd be on the lookout for me.

But in the meantime I met M at the pool tables and watched him play a couple games with a friend of his. He was shorter and a lot more feminine than I was expecting -- I was actually thinking that if ever I saw a pre-trans woman, this was it. He was so cute and he was so affectionate with me at the bar. He was literally all over me, his arms were around me, he'd sit on my knees when it wasn't his turn to play, and he held my hand when we walked up the stairs to the deck. We sat outside and talked and he said he had so many questions but he was too afraid to ask. He said he didn't want me to be offended and that he was really worried he was going to offend me, but since he already told me about him that he was hoping that would level the playing field. I said, "What about you?"

He looked shocked and said, "I told you!"

"Told me what?"

And he wouldn't say it, he wouldn't look at me, and so I said, "Nothing you're going to say is going to shock me or anything," half-expecing that he was going to tell me he wanted to be a woman and that's why he was so interested in me. It took a lot of cajoling to tell me what this big thing was but he finally blurted out, "I'm positive."

To which I responded, "I don't care."

To which he responded, "Well I do," and then I kind of felt like an insensitive ass. But it was okay and he finally blurted out his big question for me which was, "How do you do it?" Meaning, how do you have sex.

I was a little dumbfounded by this question, not that I couldn't answer, but that he asked...he literally had no idea. He'd never seen a vagina before. He was completely clueless. So I kinda explained. And then he kissed me, on the lips, just a peck. He asked me what I wanted to do and I asked him if he wanted to go back to my place and we headed back and lit up the bong. We sat next to each other and started making out, his cock came out, you know the rest. He spent a lot of time sucking my dick and there was one point when I was lying on top of him but propped up just a little bit and I was jerking off his dick. This is gonna sound stupid, but for just that moment, the placement and everything...I looked down and it almost looked like I was jerking off my own dick. Or at least that's what I thought.

We didn't fuck, and when he came it was from jerking himself off (I wanted to finish him off with my mouth but his dick was really big and my jaw started hurting after awhile), and then I got really self-conscious and put clothes on. But there were a few times, between him shooting and him leaving, where we just held each other for awhile. And that was so nice.

After he left I remembered the other guy and that I hadn't seen him and I decided to drop him a note to see if we could try some other time, but he beat me to it:

i saw u tonite... very nice... you were hiding behind
the column while your friends played pool. I'm sure
you are a great guy... hopefully, we'll introduce
ourselves and see what happens, eh?

oh btw, I'm sure you'd make a perfect bitch.

Heh. I've been having a pretty good stream of luck lately.
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Best Response Ever.

Jul. 28th, 2005 | 11:17 pm
mood: happyhappy
music: Coldplay - Sparks

A guy just sent me a message in response to my profile:

good for you baby. :)

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Tips on Profile Writing

Jul. 28th, 2005 | 08:59 am

Someone emailed me asking specifics about profile content on some of these sites and I thought my response might answer some questions for other guys out there so I thought I'd post it:

I have been on T since November 2004 (so roughly 7 months?) and no, I have not had chest surgery. I'm still in that "I look like a 16 year old boy" period which honestly probably helps me a lot.

In my profile, the first thing I say is that I'm a transguy. I usually say something really close to this:

"I'm a 23-year-old trans guy (FTM), can host in -------------. Completely pass as male except I have an extra hole where my dick should be. If I just blow you, you'll never know I wasn't born male. I love to fuck (in either hole) if you're interested. Especially love aggressive tops who take what they want and know how to fuck a boy hard."

So kind of what I try to do is incorporate the trans stuff as normally as I can. and to treat it as normally as I can. I've found being matter-of-fact about your deal will take you a lot farther than ambiguity. Plus, if you're straight up, you avoid a lot of rejection. Plus, how you talk about your trans stuff in your profile will set the tone for how guys talk to you and how they perceive it - if you can make it sound hot, like how you've got this extra hot hole to fuck or how your little tranny dick gets hard, you'll have more positive responses. Also, you have to be confident and sure of yourself, and be really clear with guys about who you are and what you want. For example (this is a trick I learned from mysteryfag), a lot of times guys will refer to my "pussy" when the respond. Now they have no idea that I don't like that word, but I always respond with some variation of, "I actually call it my cunt, pussy sounds too girlie." Being all online makes it easier, I don't know if I could say things like that to a guy in person.

Now I put up a face pic, in fact, all my photos are clothed. The main reason for that is that any site that reviews photos and profiles before making them public (both manhunt and men4sexnow do, for example) will reject any photos with "female" parts. However, I would put up a face picture anyways because that's what people notice first, that's how you get their attention. Profiles without photos get skipped over. Also, if you're telling people you're trans in your profile (and most people won't really understand what that means), it really helps to show them your face to show them you're a normal looking guy (and if they're physically attracted to you, they're more likely to want to talk to you). Of course that's a level of disclosure that a lot of transguys would not be comfortable with and I completely understand why. I live in a large city that is fairly trans-friendly (relatively speaking, but no, I don't live in SF or NYC) and I feel comfortable doing that, but if I lived in a tiny town in Alabama, I probably wouldn't, you know?

I also have about four or five naked shots that I'll send guys if I get their personal email or something - a couple "crotch" shots and a couple more shots that show my whole body.

Oh, and if guys are asking "how big it is" they don't get it, so you have to make the decision of whether the guy is going to get it or if he's not worth your time. I haven't gotten a "how big is it" question since I started using that profile format above, but when I do get questions about my dick (sometimes guys are confused that I call it my dick for starters), I try to explain it something like this:

"I've been on testosterone for x months, it's made my clit grow a little and I call it my dick. It's so weird, the testosterone actually makes it react somewhat like a dick too, it gets hard and I can even feel it pulsing when I cum."

Most guys are pretty intrigued when I tell them that. I really think the key is, even if you're not 100% comfortable with your body (and how many trans people are?), to present like you are (at least when you're negotiating with guys, it's okay to be nervous and shy when you actually hook up, most guys are). It's just like sales, you have to be convinced that the product you're selling is the best product on the market.

As for the S/M question, I do superficially agree with you, the BDSM community seems to generally be more accepting of trans people, but I don't have enough personal experience in that community to really comment. Maybe someone else can?

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Southern Boy

Jul. 27th, 2005 | 09:04 pm

He found me on manhunt, he's in town for a couple days on business. He gave me his hotel room number and told me to be there at 8, and I knocked on his door about five minutes early, nervous as all hell.

He opened the door, nice looking guy, goatee, maybe late 30s? He had a sweet southern accent and a nice smile. I went in, he told me I could lie down so I did (wow, hotel beds are comfortable...at least Marriot hotel beds are comfortable). He sat down next to me on the bed and we made a little small talk, he said he was really nervous but that my profile "intrigued" him. I asked him if he had any questions for me and he said, "well, sure, lots." But he only asked me one, "What are you into?"

I hate that question for the same reason I hate, "what do you do for fun?" because I never want to answer that honestly. ("Honestly? I smoke pot and fuck guys for fun.") It's the same thing with the "what are you into" question, and I recognize that it's an important question and really helps to convey a lot of info, I just never answer it "honestly" (or at least, completely honestly).

I told him sucking, fucking, I'll try anything twice. And he asked, "What about kissing and showers?" As an answer I leaned in and kissed him. I've mentioned it before and I'll mention it again -- I love kissing guys with stubble or facial hair. And he was a really good kisser, biting my lips and grabbing me passionately, pulling me close to him. Our bodies were against each other and clothes started coming off. He took my hand and put it on his cock (subtle!).

I worked his cock and balls with my hand and then put his cock completely in my mouth (he was still soft) and sucked. I worked on him for a couple minutes and he wasn't getting hard and I was thinking, "great, I've done this before, he's going to be too nervous to get hard and I'm just going to have to leave." But he told me to chew the skin between his balls, and as I did his cock started to swell right before my eyes.

He wanted to fuck but neither of us had condoms (why do I always forget to bring condoms?!), so I just got down on my knees and sucked his cock. He stood there, his eyes shut tight, his head pointing to the ceiling, breathing hard while I sucked his cock.

"Put my balls in your mouth."

I sucked his balls into my mouth one at a time, slowly, tugging on them a little with my teeth, and then went back to his cock and grabbed the base of the shaft with a couple fingers and got into a rhythm of moving my head back and forth, getting a good rhythm for his cock to go in and out of my mouth. With my free hand I gripped his balls hard and he asked, "Do you swallow?" I mumbled a yes with my cock stuffed mouth and he said, "Oh fuck yeah, I'm gonna cum...here it comes, aw fuck..."

His cum filled my mouth and I sucked him for a little bit, then let his cock slide out of my mouth and one last shot of cum hit my chest. I scooped it up with my fingers, looked up at him and let him watch me lick his cum off my fingers.
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Where did this guy come from??

Jul. 26th, 2005 | 11:23 am
music: Jamiroquai - Talullah

I'm trying to remember the little details of this one because it was all those little details that made him fabulous. He messaged me on manhunt with one of those non-descript profiles saying he was just looking for friends. I never know how to respond to those because if they really are just looking for friends I'm all for it (or at least talking to them to see if we hit it off), but I hate that ambiguity. This was one of those guys - shaved head and tats and piercings (really hot), his profile said he was only looking for friends, but we chatted for awhile and he ended up coming over pretty much right away.

He walked into my apartment, I offered him some water and he declined, and there was an awkward moment. I sat down on the futon and he followed me, still a little awkward until we kissed. Best kisser ever. He wasn't shy at all about pushing his tongue in my mouth, biting my lips and pulling them with his teeth, forcing his mouth against mine. I put one hand behind his head to push him closer to me and he shoved me down onto the bed and laid on top of me, making out. He had a lot of stubble and rubbed in on my face and neck while he kissed and bit me.

His hands were undoing my pants and I reached for his belt buckle but he pushed me away and held one of my hands above my head so I couldn't really get to him. He undid my pants and tugged them down, my briefs to follow, and my dick was in his mouth. He finger fucked my cunt a little and sucked my dick and I just let him do whatever he wanted, he could have dumped a bucket of jello on me at that point and I wouldn't have cared one bit, he was so confident and aggressive and obviously into me, he could have done anything and it would have been hot. (Not really sure why I used jello as an example there, though.)

After awhile I started begging him to let me suck his cock. His response was sort of a shrug and a "sure, if you want to" so I pushed him down and trading positions. He had a nice PA and I pulled it a little with my teeth before sinking his cock completely down my throat, gagging myself. I love the groan you get when you get a guy's hard cock completely in your mouth.

I sucked him for a little bit, not very long at all to be honest, and now I forget how we transitioned from me sucking his cock to him ordering me on my stomach to get fucked, but that's what ended up happening. He fucked my cunt from behind, with me on my hands and knees. He spit on me and then shoved his cock in and fucked me pretty hard, every once in awhile smacking my ass and spitting on me again. He pulled out and spread my ass cheeks and spit a huge glob right onto my cunt and rubbed it into my dick.

He told me to get on my back so I did and spread my legs up and out for him and he sunk back in, this time coming in to kiss me again while he was fucking me. I hung onto his back while he fucked me with nice hard strokes, then he pulled out and started sucking my dick and finger fucking me hard. He then gave me the most amazing rim job I've ever had. After not very long I started bucking and telling him I was gonna cum if he didn't stop. He didn't stop and he sucked my dick hard right as I came.

He gave me a couple minutes to recover and then flipped me over onto my stomach and started fucking me from behind again. Smacking my ass, pulling on my shoulders for leverage, he just pounded into me and said, "I want you to cum again."

He kept fucking me, steady and strong, and I felt like I was getting close and I told him. He sped up and pounded me and told me to pinch his nipples as hard as I could. I grabbed his tits and dug my fingernails into them hard and he started crying out "yes! yes!" I had to put my arms out against the wall to brace myself and somehow, someway, we both came at the same time. Given how much porn writes about both people cumming at the same time, it doesn't really happen very often (or ever, in my case). But it did last night. I usually can't cum with a partner at all, let alone twice. Where did this guy come from?? He was amazing, just all-around awesome.

We made small talk a little bit afterwards and I found out that he'd been with a couple FTMs before but never got to fuck one cuz "most of them don't really seem to like being fucked." (His words, not mine.) To which I responded, "Well I do, and you can fuck me anytime you want."

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There's cum in my ear.

Jul. 24th, 2005 | 04:34 pm

There's this guy that has messaged me I don't know how many times, he's been really persistent, and he's cute but the picture he had up, there was something about...like, the angle or something made him look a little creepy, but I could tell it was just the picture and probably not him, but it was enough to keep me meeting him for a long time. Today he messaged me again and I told his straight up that the pic he had up made him look creepy and did he have another one, so he sent me one and oh so cute! Kinda stereotypically gay looking and really cute, so I told him to come straight over and he did.

He walked in and I asked him if I could get him anything, water, something else. He said no and we just started kissing, standing in the entrance to my apartment. I rubbed his cock through his shorts and he went after my nipples.

I dropped to my knees and he broke into a huge grin. I unbuckled his pants and he pulled everything down. His cock was really thick and nice and I'm not even going to pretend I could take it all in cuz I couldn't. But I had fun trying.

We moved over to the futon and I got between his knees, alternating between sucking his cock and taking my clothes off. He grabbed my nipples and made them hurt (in a good way) and he reached down and rubbed my dick and finger fucked me for a bit. I asked him if he wanted to fuck.

He had me from behind for awhile but it wasn't working quite right so we moved onto my back and my legs bent up. His cock felt really good, I wish he would have fucked me harder...he kept slowing down/pausing cuz he said he was too close. I eventually asked him to shoot on me and/or down my throat and so he pulled out and started jerking. I bent up to try and get his cock in my mouth but he said, "No, just lay back and let it hit you." And I did. And he shot like 5 or 6 pretty good streams of cum all over me, I kept my mouth open and a big splash landed part in my mouth and part on my face. I got my hand slick with cum and jerked off and asked him to finger fuck me, which he did.

After it was all over, we both collapsed on the bed and I realized there was cum leaking out of my ear. I went into the bathroom and I was literally dripping, it was so hot.

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420 Buddy

Jul. 21st, 2005 | 11:04 pm
music: Heatmiser - The Fix Is In

I love getting fucked in the ass by strangers. Love it.

This is another guy from that craigslist ad I posted a week or so ago and he was just really cool, we talked a long time and smoked like three bowls. I sucked him, he fucked my cunt, he fucked my ass, I jerked him off, he fucked me some more, he had me on my hands and knees getting fucked in the ass, and he finally shot (after like an hour of fucking) jerking himself off and me licking his balls. I love watching cocks shoot up close.

Oh, also this guy was really great with body contact - there was some passion and really hot kissing, most hook ups aren't really like that so much.

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Quickest Hook Up Ever

Jul. 19th, 2005 | 11:03 pm

I put an ad on craigslist like a week ago basically saying I wanted a 420 fuck buddy and I disclosed that I was trans in the ad. Got a couple responses. The first time I posted this ad, I didn't disclose that I was trans (I didn't say anything about being a bio guy either though) and I got 30 responses within 2 hours after posting. With disclosure, maybe three? So I met one of them tonight, we emailed back and forth a few times and he was honest about being really nervous, that he had a girlfriend and he'd never done this before, and I was very honest with him and said, "I definitely understand being nervous, it took me a long time to get up the nerve to do this. Honestly, I've met a lot of guys this way and the vast majority of the experiences were good, and the ones that were 'bad' weren't like BAD, like getting raped kind of bad, they were just a little icky." And I told him to come over, we'll light a bowl, watch some TV and if he feels like "fooling around" we can, if not we'll just watch the Simpsons and get stoned and have good time.

First, I was convinced he wasn't going to show, it was 20 after before he showed up and he'd seemed so nervous that I figured he was gonna wimp out. But he rang the bell and came up and we made small talk and hit the bong a few times. He was like 28 or so, a little scruffy, kind of a small build but a really nice body, wore a baseball cap, kind of artsy. I said, "So, you feel like doing this?" And he said, "I'm really really nervous but I still really want to." We pulled out the futon (that furniture is so useful) and laid down.

He cock was pushing through his shorts already and when he took off his shorts I noticed there was precum staining his underwear already. He asked me to get naked and I always get a little weird when guys ask me to get naked (for obvious reasons) but I did and he didn't say anything weird, he didn't touch me or look at me any differently, it was like he was totally nonplussed by my body which may sound like a bad thing, but when people are constantly fascinated with your body, it's nice when you get treated just like anyone else.

The disappointing thing was I sucked his cock for just a couple minutes before he shot, and it was kind of unimpressive (like, I didn't realize he came - I thought there was just a lot of precum in my mouth). But I still had fun.
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Cyber Sex

Jul. 19th, 2005 | 01:51 pm
mood: hornyhorny
music: Wyclef Jean - If I Was President...

I'm not much for "cyber sex," it reminds me too much of my closeted youth where I pretended to be a girl for 50-year-old married British guys. Generlly kind of unsatisfying. But man, I found someone a couple weeks ago, this wicked hot Dom on the West Coast, and I've actually turned down in-person hook ups a couple times now to talk to this guy. He's amazing, he had me jerk off last night for him and had me hold off on cumming until he told me to, and when I did...just, damn.

Let me qualify this by also saying that while I have always been interested in BDSM, most of my experiences haven't ended up being what I wanted, and I realized with this guy that the issue is more that I'm not really interested in "scenes," I need the Dom to be a Dom all the time, at least when he deals with me. But this guy is kind of special, I've never talked to anyone like him before - he's wickedly sadistic but also can be really nice and friendly. We'll shoot the shit on the phone for an hour like buddies and then before I even know it I'm on my knees begging him to piss in my butt. It's awesome.

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Out of towner.

Jul. 18th, 2005 | 01:06 am
music: Buena Vista Social Club - El Carretero

He messaged me and said he was in town for the weekend, available late nights, I should give him a call. He sent a pic and he was cute, a little shorter than me, mid-30s, balding with a lot of stubble, maybe Jewish. In his messages he said he was "FTM-friendly" so, you know, he got automatic points.

We set it up for him to come by my place at 11, he came in the door and we hit it right off and talked for close to twenty minutes about where I live and where he lives and what we do and so on, and then he moved in really quickly and kissed me and he had so much stubble on his face, it burned my cheeks (in a good way). We made out and he would rub his stubble on my neck and it just made me all tingly.

I pulled out the futon and laid down and he got on top of me and made out some more and started to dry hump a little bit as I pulled his shirt up and as he took it off, I leaned up a little and took my shirt and binder off and then he laid right back down on top of me so our torsos were naked against each other and we made out some more.

He rolled over onto his back and I went to work on his nipples, licking one and rubbing my fingers over the other one. He started moaning a little and his hips shifted a little back and forth, so I let my free hand slip down to rub his dick through his shorts. I tried to get the button undone but was having trouble so he undid it for me and zipped down his shorts. I pulled his dick through the fly of his boxers and wrapped my lips around the head for just a second and then pulled off and he tugged down the rest of his clothes.

I kneeled between his legs and sucked his dick slow, his dick was the perfect size to practice deep-throating on so I did (and he started making lots of noise so I think he was enjoying it). After several minutes he said, "You're getting me close," so I asked him if he wanted to fuck. He said yeah and we talked about position and stuff and then he's like, "actually, I don't really feel like penetration, how about you jerk off while I touch you everywhere," so, you know, that's what we did. He was jerking off too, and after a couple minutes I pulled his dick up so that he was sitting on my chest and his cock was fucking my mouth.

He laid back down on his back and I went back between his knees and slid his cock into the opening of my throat and got into a rhythm moving my head up and down, feeling his cock pushing into my throat with every thrust. When he came, he shot right down my throat, it never even hit my tongue.
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Couple nights ago...

Jul. 16th, 2005 | 12:59 pm
mood: stoned
music: Jack Johnson - Drink the Water

A couple nights ago this guy came by, straight from fucking mysteryfag to my place. I wanted my ass fucked, it'd been a long time, so I asked him if he was up to it and he said, "Absolutely."

He just comes in, kicks off his shoes, and lays down on the futon. I take off my glasses and kneel between his legs and rub his cock through his shorts, then unbuckle his belt, unzip his fly, and pull them down so his cock is out, all hiding up in it's snoodle. So I suck it out and he's hard in like a minute, I was amazed considering he just came from fucking someone. He asked me if someone taught me to suck cock and I said, "Well, no, I don't think so...I mean, I've watched lots of people give blow jobs. And I get a lot of practice." (And I survey sometimes.)

After awhile he said, "I don't want this to end but I want to fuck you," and he pushed me off his cock and flipped me onto my back, got between my legs and pushed into my cunt in one shove and just started fucking me hard. He had my legs up so my knees were right in my face and he was just pounding away and I closed my eyes and just felt him fucking me. He pushed my legs up further so my knees were on my shoulders and I grabbed right behind my knees with my hands and held them there while he fucked me, then he pulled out and I could feel his cock head pushing into my asshole. He just kind of poked my hole for a little bit with the head and then pushed in a little bit, pulled out and lubed up, and then just slipped all the way in and let out this loud guttural groan. So did I, actually. He stayed in for a couple seconds, pulled out and lubed up a little more, and then went back in and slowly rocked back and forth in my ass.

I'm essentially folded in half at this point and he starts moving a little faster, a little harder...I reach for my dick and start jerking off and he takes that as a sign to start really fucking me and he does, he's slamming into me and my head is hitting the wall and I'm thinking, "I want this to stop and I don't ever want it to stop all at the same time."

I think we both get pretty loud when we fuck, my poor neighbors. When he shot he let out this groan/growl like a wild animal and I could feel his cock pulsing. He stayed in for a couple more seconds and then carefully pulled out and we both yelped in the split second it took for his cock to escape my asshole. I just laid there comatose and he just stood there breathing hard.

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Jul. 13th, 2005 | 12:30 am

What happens when a hot, steroid-pumped, tattooed guy shows up at your door in a wife beater and gym shorts? You suck and suck and suck his monster of a cock and you say, "Hey wanna fuck?" And he says, "Yeah, this is awesome." And then the condom goes on and he loses his erection. So you take it off and suck and suck and suck some more and he just can't get hard and he says, "I'm really sorry, I feel like a douche bag, I just can't."

It's okay, he was really nice and whatever, I got to suck a really nice cock for awhile.

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Booty Call!

Jul. 10th, 2005 | 07:51 pm
music: Moby - Down Slow

This guy messaged me his phone number on Manhunt. Just his number. And I sat there for at least five minutes agonizing over whether or not to call, but I did and we talked for about a minute about "my deal" (as I like to call it), I got his address, and said, "I'll put some pants on and I'll be out the door."

First of all, I got lost. My sense of direction is terrible and it took me at least twice as long to get there and he started calling me and calling me so I felt like an ass and almost just considered forgetting it and going home, but I didn't and I found the place and he buzzed me in. I walked up the stairs and he was standing in his doorway looking down the staircase at me. He was short, blond hair, small frame, about 25, really strong Eastern European features (he actually was Ukranian).

Secondly, when I came in I was embarrassed because it was hot and humid out and I was wandering around lost and I was sweaty and a little stinky (it's funny how easier it is to get stinky when you've got testosterone in your system). But whatever, we went into his bedroom and he had a huge TV playing porn and he pulled his cock out and was just standing there talking to me, pulling his pud. He said, "Take your pants off," but I told him I wanted to wait a little bit. I got down on my knees and started sucking his cock. The first time I sucked cock, I was really not into it. I had spent so many years of my life training myself to think "ew" that it was actually pretty icky the first few times I did it. Or at least I thought it was icky. But with each cock I suck, I seriously like it more and more. And I had so much fun with this guy's cock. But I was sweating still so I had to ask him if I could use his bathroom to splash some water on my face.

I sucked him for quite awhile, and he fumbled for my pants a little bit so I shrugged and took my pants off, and then he pulled down my briefs and just grabbed my dick and jerked a little bit, then I went back down on his cock and sucked till the head was dark purple and oozing. I was going to be perfectly happy just sucking him off, but he pulled me up and told me to lie back onto the bed. He pushed my legs way up and just looked and tugged on my dick and poked around with his fingers, and then rubbed his dick on mine nice and hard.

He pushed into my cunt with his dick and fucked me real slow in and out and he just watched his dick go in and out of me. He pulled my legs even further apart and just watched, and then started fucking me a little harder, then slower and he'd watch some more. He wasn't a great fuck (I like to be fucked really hard), but it was so obvious that he was having fun and really interested and enjoying this new experience that I didn't care, it was fun.

He came in me and went to the bathroom for a second, I started putting on my clothes and he came back and said, "Sorry, normally I last a little longer, it just felt really good. And you almost had me cum when you were sucking me. It's harder for you to cum, right?"

And I said, "Yeah, usually I can't cum with other people, it's pretty rare - maybe I'm too much in my head, I don't know."

And he said, "No, it probably just takes you a little longer. It's okay." We chatted for just a couple more minutes and I headed out.

Heh, anonymous sex is fun.

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